Fostering Intergenerational relationships

One of the first thoughts to sink like a stone into my consciousness in the days following Maeve's death was the recognition that I would not have any grand children. Well in fact of course, I should appreciate the parenting experiences that I have been privileged to have: plenty of people who would make great parents are unable to physically do so. Which brings me to the topic of 'fostering' non-blood relationships, particularly across generations. In the 'old days' in Ireland and other countries, fostering wasn't what it is now, something implying a temporary, government coordinated arrangement in circumstances of inadequate parenting. It occurred among all levels of society to spread resources and mentoring and perhaps also children around. My childless Great-Aunt in Chile and her German artist husband 'fostered' a young lad from the local German community after his father became disabled. This young lad was brought up by his own loving parents but soaked in the environment of English and German and art and culture at Joan and Willi's nearby peach farm. He later went to university and became a successful engineer and in his turn looked after Joan and Willi, visiting my Great-Aunt every week and coordinating resources so that she could remain in her own home until her death at 103. None of her blood relatives came near to approaching the emotional, physical, or financial care which this fostered kinship provided.
My life is rich with inter-generational, non-blood-line, relationships which I foster. Among the relationships which give me the greatest pleasure include that with 93 year old Aase Pryor, the old Norwegian midwife who looked after an Infectious Disease unit in Brandenburg during WW2 and went on to be a pottery genius and teach jewellry in Boggo Road... we have breakfast together at least once a month and exchange all sorts of crazy ideas... the grown up children of an old boyfriend remain important to me... as is every single one of the Bumbletown Councillors - Maeve's old friends - with some of whom, for example, I went second-hand clothes-shopping in Brisbane's "Valley" today, incorporating the usual mix of fun and room to move, mutual quiet appreciation, and a tiny bit of active instruction...(how to recognise some-one on "speed", the cultural origin of crocheted bikinis, and what cold pickled chicken feet taste like!!!)
Medical advances have eased suffering in many ways and I heard on the radio the other day that IVF techniques are now being used to relieve the social stigma of childlessness for some African mothers. I am very grateful to the advances of medical science but I believe our fundamental family is the brotherhood of man and the sisterhood of all creation.
The experience of having one's own genetic children is inimitable, as the genetic bonds and the physical intimacy of pregnancy and birth cannot be replicated. However, we are often enmeshed in the complications of our relationships with our own relatives. So often our blood relationships are beset by disappointment because we are holding too tight to hurts, or to how we wish our daughter/father could be instead of accepting the way they are. Sometimes it may even seem we can 'love' our 'fostered' children, grandchildren, aunties, grandparents more freely than our natural relatives. It would do us well to open our hearts beyond fixed lines, both within our so-called "real" families, and also by fostering a broader family, particularly by extending and enjoying those mentoring relationships which come most naturally to us.